Are you aware of your patterns – your behaviors? How you do what you do, why you do that you do, how you move through what you do during your day and why you do something one way and others a different way! What are your word choices, what upsets you – what you let upset you??
Are you living or surviving…?
I lived most of my life in a mentality of surviving, just trying to make it, not sure how. I have used the example of a pioneer woman surviving on the western plains. Every day, a unique struggle of survival and sacrifice, supporting her husband and her family – because that is what life is about – but guess what, that is not true unless you are on the western prairie over 150 years ago and the choice to be in a collective community to move to a better place in life.
I have learned that this mentality is not true and is not ok; it fits under a level of abuse and is the wrong type of sacrifice when not communal.
This is not how life is to be lived.
Life is about living – making things happen, not just surviving, not settling, not agreeing or sacrificing yourself just to keep the peace, but not at peace with yourself. Peace does not come with this mentality; this mentality brings an internal struggle that you don’t even know is there until you “heal and shift.” The challenge here is that you don’t even know you are living under the mentality of survival, because what you have been told and how you have been treated, you know nothing different.
It is no different than the concept of a “frog in a kettle.” IF you put a frog in a pot of cold water and then turn it up to where it is boiling, the frog will die a slow death. However, if you throw a frog in a boiling pot of water, it will jump right out! The people on the western prairie did not start there, they arrived there, each family made choices for a new life – including many (not all) of the sacrifices at hand, giving up what they knew to learn something new. Jumping into that hot pot – leaving the warmed up one. 😊
What is what you know because you know nothing else, will kill you. You must shift to healthy thinking and behaving. You may see others who seem to jump out of the water when presented with the same circumstance as you and have no idea how they knew there was a problem or how to deal with it. Its ok, you can learn. Apart from perfect pitch, nothing is innate, you can learn almost whatever you would like to… the challenge is knowing what was abuse and what is true and what it is that takes away and or brings peace.
WOW, we all have things to learn, even more, we have things to unlearn… we must not continue how we have been – we must heal and shift.